Happy 3rd Birthday, my big girl - who refuses to be called a baby or a little girl.
"Only big girl." She corrects me every time to remind me how fast life goes by.

This morning her dad said to her,
"Happy birthday Sofia! What do you want to do today?"
Sofia goes, "I want to go to my party!"
"But your party isn't 'til Saturday.."
So she says, "I want to go to Saturday!"

She's developed quit a clever logic and also a sense of humor.
The other night I was worried that the milk I gave her might have gone bad,
so I asked her, "Does the milk taste funny?"
She takes the bottle out of her mouth looks at me and says,
"mommy, it tastes funnnyyyy..." and starts giggling.
"mommy, it doesn't taste funny! it tastes... crazyyy! hahahahaha.."
We had a good laugh at that. Such a funny girl...
or how she says it, "pho-nee."

So we're off to Sesame Street Place today!

weeeeee!!!!

haven't been feeling well all weekend and have been sort of stuck at home. it started friday after lunch, i had a massive headache that wouldn't go away and i left work early because of it. that night i had chills in my bones, the feverish kind. this happened a few times before and i've since learned to manage it. you have to really wrap yourself up so that you can sweat the cold out of your body. that helps a lot. unfortunately, it's not so easy to call in sick when you have a child. so even when your sick, you still have to attend their needs. i finally feel like i have time for myself, which i really need. more and more lately i realize how much i prefer being alone. i don't like chaos, and anything that is out of control. it is exhausting to me. don't get me wrong, i also do not like things to be perfect.. that just weirds me out. i appreciate and find beauty in the imperfect, i just don't like loud and crazy and belligerence. i've also been feeling weird vibes. like something isn't right. and i worry about such things...

anyhow, these pictures are completely unrelated to this post, but they are making me happy at the moment. they were shot throughout the month of may/june. it is taking me a while to complete a roll of film these days, which i now find to be more satisfying.

the first picture was shot one morning at home before i left for work.
the second one is from a bakery in lower east side on our way to a street fest. this was the bakery i went to the first time i visited new york in 2007.
and the third one is from inside a mcdonald's in coney island.

ps. carla morrison saved me today

i think i'm coming to terms with a messy home, i think. [looks around] okay, i'm not. but one can only do so much in a day.

lately i've been feeling restless. my ankle, which i sprained 4 years ago, still aches. as i lay awake in bed at 4am i make plans on sleeping in and then doing some stretches when i wake up. neither of these happen of course. i hate making plans because it seems 90% of the time, they never occur.

i would like to move to another apartment, one that has tall ceilings and large windows, but the inconveniences of actually moving is discouraging.

pastimes are nice to have if you actually have time to pass.

i do not enjoy my job and i still have "dreams" (no longer plans) of living in another country.

i am going to chicago in march. i kept thinking about crispy pad see ewe last night and i miss sticky rice. i once called my obsession with this restaurant a love affair. i wonder if people who love opart thai in the opposite direction have discovered this gem yet. i hope not. i also miss argyle.

karen and allison are coming in february. i can't wait to actually do things in nyc with other people. hopefully, we can dance floors.

i hope the weather gets better. i have a lot of hope in this as that it is a tiny bit light out at 5pm. cross my fingers.

me and sofia made a vlog. i love watching her watch herself. she is so tickled by it, even for the nth time.

new year's eve + lola lou's 50th

the new year came in a whirlwind
& i'm still holding on to my hat.

sofia getting ready

our guilty pleasure: white mana / "diner of the future" / 1939 world's fair building.

the burgers. it's like white castle, but better.

the snow finally came. all i can think about these days are food and comfort.
life is 2.5 times harder.
i say 2.5 because that's how many hours late i was to work this morning.
it really is difficult, all of it.
where do i begin.

my mantra for today was: "only the strong survive"
the PATH train station on grove st. was packed.
they had to shut down the turnstiles to control the amount of people
on the platform because trains were running on some "special" schedule
which required rerouting to hoboken.
so i waited for the wtc train instead.
it didn't come for a while. i ended up right by the edge of the platform.
which made me fear for my life, thinking to myself:
some one better not go berserk right now, because i could seriously fall off this edge.
i could feel the person behind me swaying.

at last the train came.
i took my time walking and trying not to slip into gray sludge.

i made it to work, eventually. had to stay til 7 though.

tomorrow will be better.


***
on another note

these pictures were shot a few weeks ago.
when i went all shutter happy.
i've picked up the cameras again for the holidays
and this time i bought some nice film.
i'm excited to see how they turn out.
i don't think i'll be able to develop them any time soon, though.
but... i've got tons of food pictures...
as if you guys don't see enough of those.

H A P P Y H O L I D A Y S !

happy thanksgiving internet friends.

we drove up to westchester, ny and had lunch with our immediate family. we're thankful for a new day and being alive and well. 3.5 hours was spent on the road so we stopped by the stateline looking out to new york. it was really beautiful and peaceful because we were the only ones there. the weather was drizzly and we took pictures while sofia jumped in piles of dead leaves. i took a chance with a newly acquired camera which batteries are hard to find for, and shot without a light meter. on top of which i am using this lomo film which allows you to set your iso between 50-200 to achieve either a desaturated look or the contrary. i am sort of confused about it. but we shall see if it turns out. the rest of the day was spent with the palumbo's. andrew and i have decided they should have their own reality show called, "joe & cherry plus 2... and bob dylan". (because katherine has a crazy do and she looks like him). it was pretty chill and we didn't over stuff ourselves.

now eating leftovers and watching tv all day in our pajamas.

anyhow these are some test shots i took with the minolta srt, which i have been having a love hate relationship with. i am thinking about getting rid of it, but every time i find someone on flickr who shoots with it, i get re-inspired. here are some of my favorite shots with it. the one's with * i had adjusted brightness/color in photoshop.

*

*


*

this book is by a flickr friend long lim, who shoots mainly with the srt. one of the reasons why i wanted to try out this camera. also this story made me want to eat an apple. hence, the apple.